libceph: fix messenger retry

In ancient times, the messenger could both initiate and accept connections.
An artifact if that was data structures to store/process an incoming
ceph_msg_connect request and send an outgoing ceph_msg_connect_reply.
Sadly, the negotiation code was referencing those structures and ignoring
important information (like the peer's connect_seq) from the correct ones.

Among other things, this fixes tight reconnect loops where the server sends
RETRY_SESSION and we (the client) retries with the same connect_seq as last
time.  This bug pretty easily triggered by injecting socket failures on the
MDS and running some fs workload like workunits/direct_io/test_sync_io.

Signed-off-by: Sage Weil <sage@inktank.com>